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Psychologist Hacks For Improving Your Chances In Online Dating
Burnt out from the dating app scene? If you’ve been at it for a while, it’s easy to get discouraged.Really, how many times can you get ghosted before you lose it?
Fear not! Here’s some professional help to improve your chances of finding a partner online without throwing your phone into the toilet and giving up on love.
- Figure out your motives and be honest.Research suggests people use dating apps for entertainment, self-esteem boosting, escaping anxiety, out of boredom, and more.Did you notice love in that list? Nope.Figure out why you’rereallyon these apps and be honest about it. “Once you are clear about what you want and what your expectations are, and you are brave enough to communicate them, you will have a much better chance of finding a partner,” says clinical psychologistAdele D’Ari.
- Be yourself.Everyone is guilty of presenting their “best-life” online, but it’s one thing to filter over a pic on Instagram, and another to hide traits on Tinder. You want to attract people to the real you, so don’t gloss over what makes you different. Embrace it. In fact, research shows that highlighting unusual interests leads to greater online dating success. “Eschew social expectations and let your traits speak for themselves,” suggestsJoanne Davila, a professor of clinical psychology at Stony Brook University.
- Limit time spent and matches.Turns out, these apps getting popular, and giving us more choices of singles is actuallynot great.A recent study found “when people notice that they are rejecting more and more profiles, their dissatisfaction with the dating pool increases and they become very pessimistic about their chances of finding a partner online.” So to stay optimistic, limit your time spent on the app, and the number of people you’re talking with.Go for quality, not quantity.
- It’s not them, it’s you.Associate Professor of Psychology ResearchPaul Eastwicksays you’re being too picky online and knows why. Think of it this way. At a bar or party, if three men were trying to talk to a beautiful woman, it’s unlikely that a fourth one will try his luck. But online, “context is lacking and the price of rejection is low, so we keep reaching for the stars.” In other words,lower your standards.
- Meet in person ASAP.We are actually awful at predicting who we will like in person and the longer you spend texting without meeting, the more unrealistic your expectations become, according to Professor Eastwick. If things don’t move to real life in the first couple of weeks,move on.
Source:Washington Post
Some Parents Swear By The “Four-Gift Rule”
Tired of piling up presents for your kids under the tree only to have them lose interest in most of them before New Year’s Eve? Maybe you’ll want to try what some parents are doing to save time, money, and to cut back on the excess: follow the “four-gift rule.”
So how does it work?They only give their children these four presents:
- Something they want
- Something they need
- Something they wear
- Something they read
The trend has been around for a while and it’s seen a recent surge in popularity because parents are frazzled from trying to keep up with their kids’ ambitious wish lists. It allows moms and dads to spend more time thinking about each gift and not have to stress about buying a bunch of stuff they might not be able to afford and their kiddos won’t care about in a couple of weeks anyway. The four-gift rule also gives kids the opportunity to really think about what they need, not just come up with a bunch of stuff they think they want in the moment.
It’s a move away from all the materialism and shifts the focus to quality, not quantity. And it helps parents stick to a reasonable budget, without feeling like Scrooge.
Source:Yahoo
Presents Teachers Really Want From Students
What do you get for the person who spends almost as much time with your kids as you do? We’re talking about their teachers and they tend to be some of the toughest people to buy for. There are all kinds of options out there, but some presents are appreciated more than others. This is what actual teachers say are their favorite gifts from students.
- Gift cards- These are a popular choice, but not necessarily to the places you’d think. One teacher says she has at least $150 in unused Starbucks gift cards and that cards to Amazon and Target are better because teachers usually shop for their classes.
- Find out the teachers interests- If a gift card feels too impersonal, find out what their interests are and take it from there. If they’re into yoga or baking, you can come up with gift ideas focused on that.
- Make it practical- If you’re not sure what your child’s teacher is into, useful items work well. Some ideas include personalized pencils or notepads, a set of Flair pens for grading, a good bottle of wine, or a personalized lanyard they can wear every day at school.
- From the heart- Some teachers love it when their student is involved in choosing or making the gift. Let your child pick out a book they think their teacher would like or create some artwork or write a nice letter to their teacher. Lots of teachers say notes of appreciation are some of their absolute favorite gifts from students.
Source:Good Morning America